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This is my very
 private and very passionatehealth message for all young (or old) people to read...... From 1997, on a regular basis, I looked after a cute little Maltese Terrior, named Emma. Her human mother, Mrs Nixon-Smith, would regularly have go into hospital
 for treatment .When I would go visit Mrs Nixon-Smith in hospital, I would hide her little dog in a big shoulder bag. Seeing her little dog, would sometimes be the only thing that releaved her dreadful and angonizing pain. My beautiful, delightful and inspiring friend, sadly passed away  in 1999 from  cancer of the esophagus, a blatent result from passive smoking. Her beloved husband Archie, who chain smoked since a teenager, died about four years eariler from lung cancer. I made a promise to myself, the very first day I met Mrs Nixon-Smith and listened to her story. I have regretably not kept that promise. And even though I have witnessed people I love dearly, die far too young from those insideous man-made and daily manufactured, cancer causing creations, I unfortunately ,
still
 buy an expensive packet of  every day, even though I
 know  !!!!!Sadly  I am  hooked and PAYING for it in more ways than one!!!!!!!!. I first started damaging my lungs  as a teenager, which I now truly, truly, regret. I only started because I wanted to be like and "be liked"  by the other girls at school. Low self steem was obviously my instigater!!!I always thought I could give up when ever I wanted to. And, for a long time... I could. I would sometimes just smoke socially and not smoke at other times. Well, that was many years ago, now I wake up in the morning, and the first thing I crave for, is a disgusting  cigarette AND if I don't have any, I get into a complete  panic!!!! I can't settle down until  I put one in my gob!I've even been known to knock  on the corner shop window at 5.30am to get the attention of the store owners. How sad, rude and desperate is that!! The minute I put one in my mouth, I do feel calmer, (even though I can feel my heart racing like a maniac and I feel my chest tighten) , but then straight afterwrds, I am  actually drained  of my energy . I suppose that's because we need oxygen to breathe, feel alive and feel well,  NOT toxic smoke!!Anyway, cigarettes are HIGHLY addictive and yes, unfortuantely they are especially designed that way, I guess so the big tabaco companies and other business'can keep making huge amounts of money from us suckers  , I mean smokers!!!!After being a smoke "sucker" for many years, I have now developed these dangerous, yet stupid and false beliefs that I can't cope without cigarettes and I honestly feel I can't give up!!!! (well actually I could instantly, if cigarettes were taken off the market or I was marooned  on a deserted island with a bunch  of NON smoking  friends) Fat  chance!! Anyway, I've tried many different things to give up, like... hypnosis, lazer accupuncture, reading quit books, kinesiology, health retreats or should I say torture camps  and following programs, even sucking  on babies dummies!It feels I've waisted a life time smoking and I have spent
so much of my hard earned money on cigarettes,in one way
smoking and the other in trying to give up!!!
 Though I am determined not to let cigarettes beat me or control me any longer, well.... not for too much longer,
I hope! "Yeahrrr
 right!!!!"So, kids It's definitely not If you do not smoke, stay that way and congratulate yourself!!! And if you are thinking about starting... please DON'T. Don't be an idiot!!!! Create some self worth and find your courage from within...to say NO Your "supposed" friends or other teenagers Be a mentor, for kids your own age and Be proud and confident to say Say NO Everyone deserves good, healthy and happy things in their life. Look after your precious body, mind and soul and please don't feed them utter trash!!!! BELIEVE IN YOURSELF!!! And train your thoughts to be positive! Give yourself treats that HONESTLY give you TRUE pleasure and well being, not... stinking poisonous smoke or even mind altering drugs!!! Enjoy life to your full potential!! What do you think Below, is Bryan's story!
This photo was taken only hours before Bryan Lee Curtis died of lung cancer, this photo has circulated around the world, on hundreds of Web sites. Curtis' dying wish was that telling his story might help even one person stop smoking. Cigarette smoke hangs in the air in the room where Bryan Lee Curtis lies dying of lung cancer. His head, bald from chemotherapy, lolls on a pillow. The bones of his cheeks and shoulders protrude under taut skin. His eyes are open, but he can no longer respond to his mother or his wife Bobbie, who married him in a makeshift ceremony in this room, after doctors said there was no hope. In Bryan's emaciated hands, Bobbie has propped a photograph taken just two months ago. See below. It shows a muscular and seemingly healthy Bryan holding his 2-year-old son, Bryan Jr. In the picture, he is 33. Bryan turned 34 on May 10.
A pack of cigarettes and a lighter sit on a table near Bryan's bed in his mother's living room. Even though tobacco caused the cancer now eating through his lungs and liver, Bryan smoked until a week ago, when it became impossible. Across the room, a 20-year-old nephew crushes out a cigarette in a large glass ashtray where the butt joins a dozen others. Bobbie Curtis says she'll try to stop after the funeral, but right now, it's just too difficult. Same for Bryan's mother, Louise Curtis. "I just can't do it now," she says, although she hopes maybe she can after the funeral. Bryan knew how hard it is to quit. But when he learned he would die because of his habit, he thought maybe he could persuade at least a few kids not to pick up that first cigarette. Maybe if they could see his sunken cheeks, how hard it was becoming to breathe, his shriveled body, it might scare them enough. So a man whose life was otherwise unremarkable set out in the last few weeks of his life with a mission. * * *Bryan started smoking when he was just 13, building up to more than two packs a day. He talked about quitting from time to time, but never seriously tried. Plenty of time for that, he figured. Older people got cancer. Not people in their 30s, not people who worked in construction, as a roofer, as a mechanic. He had no health insurance. But he was more worried about his mother, 57, who had smoked since she was 25.
"He would say, "Mom, don't worry about me. Worry about yourself. I'm healthy,' " Louise Curtis remembers. "You think this would happen later, when you're 60 or 70 years old, not when you're his age." He knew, only a few days after he went to the hospital on April 2 with severe abdominal pain, how wrong he had been. He had oat cell lung cancer that had spread to his liver. He probably had not had it long. Also called small cell lung cancer, it's a common and aggressive killer that usually claims the lives of its victims within a few months. While it seems unusual to the Curtis family, Dr. Jeffrey Paonessa, Bryan's oncologist, said he is seeing more lung cancer in young adults. "We've seen lung cancer earlier and earlier because people are starting to smoke earlier and earlier," Paonessa said. Chemotherapy sometimes slows the process, but had little effect in Bryan's case, he said. Bryan also knew, a few days after the diagnosis, that he wanted somehow to try to save at least one kid from the same fate. He sat down and talked with Bryan Jr. and his 9-year-old daughter, Amber, who already had been caught once with a cigarette. But he wanted to do more. Somehow, he had to get his story out. When he still had some strength to leave the house, kids would stare. "They'd come up and look at him because he looked so strange," Louise Curtis said. "He'd look at them and say, "This is what happens to you when you smoke.' "The kids would say, "Oh, man. I can't believe it,' " Louise Curtis said.
In the last few weeks, Bryan's mother has been the agent for his mission to accomplish some good with the tragedy. She has called newspapers and radio and television stations, seeking someone willing to tell her son's story, willing to help give him the one thing he wanted before he died. Bryan never got to tell his story to the public. He spoke for the last time an hour before a visit from a Times reporter and photographer. "I'm too skinny. I can't fight anymore," he whispered to his mother at 9 a.m. June 3. He died that day at 11:56 a.m., just nine weeks after the diagnosis. Bryan Lee Curtis Sr. was buried at Memorial Park Cemetery in St. Petersburg on June 8, a rare cloudy day that threatened rain. At the funeral service at nearby Blount, Curry and Roel Funeral Home, Bryan's casket was open and 50 friends and relatives could see the devastating effects of the cancer. Addiction is more powerful. As the graveside ritual ended, a handful of relatives backed away from the gathering, pulled out packs of cigarettes and lit up.  After the graveside service June 8, this friend and a handful of relatives light up Yes, any addiction is powerful!!
Prevention is always better than a cure!! Sorry, just one more thing... Please be aware,
 your pets  suffer too, from your smoke! They can get get all kinds of cancers from your second hand smoke.And p.s.my apologies, the health retreat wasn't like a torture camp!
Anyway,
I will try and leave you on a happy
 note How nice is it to see or hear Cheers,
Hayley |
, I beg you 
it always knows the truth!! 
